Do you see any patterns?

When reading the beginning of my essay it is clear there is repetition within my essay as I am looking to talk about the importance of the arts in sciences. But I don’t overly use pointing terms or transitions mainly because I feel as though they were not needed in this particular area of my writing.

Do you rely on certain devices?

I would say overall in my writing I often rely on transitions. I find myself using after, then, and but a lot within my writing, along with other key transition terms.

Are there any passages that are hard to follow?

I believe the passage I posted below is hard to follow, as I repeat many of the same ideas. This creates a lot of words that ultimately lose their meaning. I need to go back and condense my writing and create a clear main point that allows the reader to clearly understand what I am looking to say.